GLOBAL SUMMIT ENDS WITH AGREEMENT TO MEET AGAIN MARKETS UP, DOWN, AND SIDEWAYS SIMULTANEOUSLY SCIENTISTS DISCOVER THING, REQUEST MORE FUNDING NEW APP FIXES PROBLEM CREATED BY OLD APP EVERYTHING IS FINE, OFFICIALS INSIST VAGUELY AREA MAN READS ENTIRE ARTICLE, SURVIVES GLOBAL SUMMIT ENDS WITH AGREEMENT TO MEET AGAIN MARKETS UP, DOWN, AND SIDEWAYS SIMULTANEOUSLY SCIENTISTS DISCOVER THING, REQUEST MORE FUNDING NEW APP FIXES PROBLEM CREATED BY OLD APP EVERYTHING IS FINE, OFFICIALS INSIST VAGUELY AREA MAN READS ENTIRE ARTICLE, SURVIVES
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